Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Victory Through Superior Firepower

The darkness of the mission demanded thermal imaging to acquire the target. In the total blackness of the confined spaces and hidden enclaves the enemy favored, no human eye or video camera could detect the signs of life that would indicate the invaders had established a nest for their destructive operations. Only the heat signatures of the swarming, but insidious, foe could reveal their whereabouts, and only by exposing them completely could there be any hope of defeating them. Leaving even a few would enable them to multiply in the darkness and rise again, like bugs, mindlessly bent on destruction, consumption, and their own procreation. The new technology was a Godsend, able to sniff out enemies by the very heat and moisture of their bodies. It went alone into the darkness, and when it found the signs it sought, it's computer mind felt no mercy as the enemy was exposed and demolished, writhing in the death throes of chemical destruction.

Sounds brutal, eh? Good. I say every one of them should die, and no one should shed the tiniest tear or feel the least remorse, just as if they were bugs. Why? Because they are bugs--termites to be exact--and the technology that seeks their heat signatures is the latest in exterminator gear, designed to slip down those narrow passages and hidden ducts that protect the enemy from the human messengers of death pitted in combat against those creatures whose whole existence focuses on eating us out of house and home. As the Termite Wars rage on, and the enemy continues to find ways to elude our extermination warriors, technology steps in to give the homeowner one more weapon in the fight to protect their homes from destruction, while avoiding some of the collateral damage to walls and floors, previously destroyed in the quest to access the invading menace. This remote-controlled weapon is called a Termibot, and for that reason alone, I had to tell you about it. How could I not share the existence of something called a Termibot? Gizmag revealed it to me, and now I reveal it to you. I hope you never need the services of an extermination warrior, but if you do, for your sake and that of your home, I hope the Termibot is on the front lines, in the ducts and trenches of Battlefield Home. "Never give up. Never surrender." Victory!!